Right decision?

Wow, Its only just hit me that I move away to university in September… thats 7 months away. I’ve always dreamed about going to uni and it being the best time of my life, but my worried, paranoid self has just kicked it and screwed shit up.

So if some of you read my post a few months back you will know that i got onto a scheme to reduce my grades for one of the top universities in the UK, and thankfully i passed, reducing the required grades i needed to do a biology degree with integrated masters to ABB instead of the usual A*AA/AAA, requirements. This was incredible and I had never been happier than the moment I found out I got the news. However, by stupid panic mindset has now set me in a tailspin and I don’t know what to do, heres why:

1- I got a letter from the university saying that the majority of the students on the course gain all A*’s, and although with my reduced grades this is not a requirement for me, I fear that I will not be able to keep up with the rest of the class, and ultimately struggle with how hard the course is going to be. Not forgetting how bloody hard it is to start with

2- Alongside this point, If everyone else is this smart then it will decrease the chance I will come out with a good degree, like most i would aim for a 2:1, but with everyone else brainbox’s I’d have no chance!

3- I don’t know if I’m passionate enough about Biology to spend 4 years studying it, alongside the fact that if I’m struggling, i will have to revise for it 24/7. Don’t get me wrong I don’t dislike it, I don’t mind lessons and I find it quite interesting, but if its all I’m doing then I hope I enjoy it. And honestly, thinking about it, I much prefer maths (just throwing that curveball out there)

4- Career prospects!!!! WTF will I do with a biology degree! Like yeah Genetics interests me, but when i think of my 40 year old self, I don’t see myself in a Lab, quite frankly I see myself at a desk job as an accountant or something????

Wow, I just don’t know what to do. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? or know how hard biology is at Uni??

I’d really appreciate any help I could get.



A week of being Veggie

So if you read my previous post you would have seen I was contemplating going vegetarian (don’t worry this isn’t going to be all i blog about) and  I just thought I would update you.

It wasn’t as hard as I thought, I don’t know if its just the novelty and trying to prove people wrong about not being able to do it, but I’ve had no meat for a week now.


To be honest this was the hardest day, it was when I told my parents, in which they sniggered and said I couldn’t do it, but they would try and alter meal for me, which, to be honest I feel bad about. But as I have been revising, my brothers friend came over and brought me haribos to snack on while I worked. It was soooooo hard to have them there but not eat them!! but I managed and I got over it quick enough. They then ordered dominos for lunch, and I really wanted to order my fav pizza (texas BBQ) but it has meat on! so i had to stick to just some wedges 😦


I managed fine throughout the day, without much hassle. I had a veggie burger for tea which was actually quite nice, but I’m at the gym 3 nights a week, so I feel like missing out on the protein isn’t really helping me out…


My dad realised I actually was taking this seriously so went out and bought me some sweet potato keivs.. which to be honest weren’t the nicest but at least he tried to help me out!


I can’t for the life of me remember what I had to eat, but I did struggle slightly just thinking about never having meat again, is a bit scary since It really is the staple food. Im still going to go with it, but I don’t think i will be able to do it forever!


My parents went away for the night so me and my brother had a night in. We watched films and ordered another dominos (We don’t normally have them this often, honest haha). But I reluctantly swapped out the meat on my pizza for more veg, and honestly it was still god damn delicious! To be fair, i still feel full after eating, I just feel like the meat does have health benefits with it being protein, but i may be wrong.


This was the day I told my grandparents. The are my absolute heros, but they are stuck in their ways, so I wasn’t expecting it to go down well, but honestly they were fine about it. I missed out on the food they had made because it was (surprise surprise) all meat based, but I feel like I have to stick with it longer now that they will be on my back too!

All in all it hasn’t been as bad as I expected, and I am defiantly going to try and keep at it for a little longer. Its just hard thinking of various meals to make!
If anyone has any advice on substitutes for the lack of protein it would be greatly appreciated as that is the main concern I have with it!

Thanks for all you help on my previous post as well


Is Vegetarianism achievable?

Okay, so recently I’ve been an annoying philosophical shit where I’ve been thinking about the world and my future (probably by the prompt need to decided what to do with my life, but thats a different story).

Recently I’ve become increasingly aware of the world around me and how totally ignorant i am. If there is something on the television or online consisting of the process of killing animals for either fun or food, i turn away, or even cry. And this is my problem. Im against animal cruelty but i still eat meat, and pretend that it wasn’t once living and killed in some manner that i am so against being shown on Tv.

IM A HYPOCRYTE. and thats just not right… but honestly i really don’t feel i have the means or resilience to carry vegetarianism through.

The thing is that my family are that old fashioned kinda gig where we eat a home cooked meal together everynight, were meat and two veg is a solid base to whatever is been made. Honestly i would be so awkward to have to make a separate meal every night, not to mention that I don’t have the widest pallet to think up delicious and healthy meals.

Although the values of vegetarian ways is something i do support and stand by, the means carry that forward are just something I’m finding really unachievable. Does anyone have any advice on this?


Am I Normal?

So i know I’ve been away a while but a lot has been going on in the world of exams, however recently I’ve been feeling down and think this is the best place to vent my emotions.

the pressure of life milestones is something I’ve been feeling very heavily recently. Boyfriends, kissing, jobs, university, just to name a few. All things I’m not ready for but my peers have all experienced and confident about (in particular the boys part)

See, I’m now 17 and suppose to have experienced all these amazing things with “boyfriends” and suppose to have had my heart broken 232253 times, and this has been amplified recently by:

1. sounds stupid, but tv shows, they are all 16/17 and have had these great relationships and had their first kiss at 13

2. Drinking games/ parties! it seems like everyone is playing ‘never have i ever’, but how can i participate, when i have NEVER DONE ANYTHING

3. The asking!! if i go out with one boy once everyone will assume i will have had sex with them which adds even more pressure, which i don’t think i could handle

i understand that everyone progresses at different rates, but at this age, i shouldn’t be scared of this ‘boyfriend lark’, and its mainly just the first kiss I’m terrified about, will i do it right, will they laugh, will they just say ew and tell their friends. Im just scared. and its dominating my life. Its all i think about and i can’t handle it anymore




Set the scene for revision

now I know no-ones perfect when it comes to revision, but I’ve been doing it for a couple years now, and seems to have some good results, so id love to share with you guys…

1- YOUR SPACE- now I’m not the most organised person when it comes to life, but my working space is a must. everything has its place and everything my desk is positioned perfectly, this isn’t essential but it stops the procrastination of “better look for this” or the endless searching for a sheet you later find stuffed in the bottom of your draw. Its just more efficient

2- PREPARE- phones out of the room, laptops and tablets too. replace them with a drink and some food you can pick at such as grapes or sweets, just so that your not running in and out when you “fancy something”

3-SET GOALS- don’t be unrealistic. either set a time goal such as saying i want to work for half an hour have a fie minute break and repeat, or set a work goal, e.g., aim to get 5 questions complete and have a 5 minute break

4- BREAK- as i said above make sure you break, your brain physically cannot take in all the information without breaks and you will become disinterested so have short breaks to do what you want, so there are no temptations to give up.

now this is how to overall set the scene to revise, if you want to know my revision techniques just let me know!


First Driving Lesson!

who knew there was so many ‘things’ to learn! yeah i knew it wouldn’t be easy, but bloody hell, theres so much to know at once.

I had an hour lesson, and i didn’t even have time to drive, he taught me all about how to adjust everything for me, and what all the buttons do, and what the pedals are, i think i got the hang of it but i didn’t even get to try it out in practice. I was a bit bummed, but then again id rather wait till he thinks I’m ready, and i know its going to take me a few months before I’m properly driving… But all in all, i think it went okay, and I’m exited to try again next week!

update: My university progression course starts next Saturday where i have to go for the while day. Looking online though, its quite hard to pass the assessed summer school, so theres another worry ontop of having to get the grades still! however I’m trying to stay optimistic!!

has anyone else started driving yet? how long do you think it will be before I’m going to mcdonalds drive thru? any tips or hacks to become a great driver quite? haha


Growing Up FAST

Oh dear me, I had such an overwhelming day yesterday it still doesn’t feel real! everything seems to happen so fast!

1) I got my provisional licence and booked my driving lessons! like WTF i can hardly walk in a straight line never mind try and drive a car, that ones a mixture of nerves, scared and exited as well as feeling “I’m not old enough to do that am i”, never the less I’m starting next weekend and i think I’m ready!

2) UNIVERSITY!!! what even?? thats suppose to be 2 years time, what am i doing, i think my mam is really expecting me to pack my bag and leave tomorrow the way she’s going on! its only school holidays with projects and assessments through the year! it still seems like something I’m just not ready for… and in reality I’m not, but I’m so exited to start, its my absolute dream! my welcome meeting is on the 24th and although its daunting walking into a room full of strangers who will become the people i spend my university years with, i think NCS has gave me the confidence to do it. I CAN DO IT!!

so ill keep you all up to date on these but does anyone else feel like this? any driving tips haha? have fun guys